Tag Archives: stress

Got Stress?

9 Oct

#1 – Difficulty concentrating
#2 – Trouble making decisions
#3 – Negative outlook on life
#4 – Anxious or racing thoughts
#5 – Constant worrying

Emotional Symptoms
#6 – General moodiness
#7 – Irritability or short temper
#8 – Agitation, anger, and the inability to relax
#9 – Feeling overwhelmed with life
#10 – Feeling lonely and isolated
#11 – Depression or general unhappiness

Physical Symptoms
#12 – Aches and pains in the body
#13 – Diarrhea or constipation, bowel problems
#14 – Nausea, dizziness, vertigo
#15 – Chest pain, rapid heartbeat, pounding of the heart
#16 – Loss of sex drive
#17 – Frequent colds or flu viruses

Behavioral Symptoms
#18 – Eating more or less
#19 – Sleeping too much or too little
#20 – Isolating yourself from others
#21 – Procrastinating or neglecting life’s responsibilities
#22 – Using alcohol, cigarettes, or drugs to relax, or in excess
#23 – Nervous habits

I took a hard look and found that my husband and i show symptoms in each of the categories. And here is my conclusion: we are both more stressed than is healthy, and, more importantly, we have been living with too much stress for years. My recent cancer diagnosis is the proof of it. (Stay tuned, i am in the process of writing more about this.)

Nick Ortner suggests tapping, also called EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique). Tapping is really great. I used it after a near miss with another car that re-triggered trauma from an old accident. EFT was exactly what i needed. It helped me calm down, shed some of the old trauma, and brought me back to the current moment.

But do i believe that tapping is the solution to systemic stress? No, i don’t. That’s like having lung cancer and instead of stopping smoking, going on an oxygen tube while continuing to smoke. That’s clever, and it may help a little, but it is not a solution. If you have a systemic problem you have to be willing to look at the system as a whole and all the factors that create your stress. The only real change is achieved once you find the base cause of your stress and change it in a way that does not create new systemic stress. That’s not easy because we all live the way we live for a reason. We have responsibilities and are attached to certain habits and things. And we use these habits and things to justify the stress.

Take a moment and go back to the stress symptoms and mark those that apply to you. Be honest. If you have one or two symptoms, tapping might be the right solution for you. But if you have more, chances are that what produces your stress is an integral part of your life. You need more than tapping. You need to look at the very fabric of your everyday life, locate the stress-producing factors, and then compassionately and creatively eliminate or minimize the stress factors.

Stress leads to many health problems, cancer is just one of them. It also leads to many social and relational problems. If you have stress symptoms, take them seriously and find the help that is appropriate for you. This is your one and precious life and you do not want to waste it.

If you are ready to get help sorting out your systemic stress, consider coaching. Joining me for a SoulAlchemy group might be a good first step. And if your stress is temporary or limited and you are interested in tapping visit https://www.thetappingsolution.com.

Photo by Edu Lauton on Unsplash

© Eva Ruland, October 2018

SelfCare strategies for challenging times

3 Dec

The last weeks have been a major challenge for all progressives in this country. The normal reaction to a challenge that we can’t easily solve and that might have major consequences for our future and the future of the planet is to experience fear and feel stressed. Both the body and the mind shut down and lock into emergency mode. Over time this wears us down physically and emotionally. Mentally, it leads to revisiting the same loop of being caught in inescapable doom. We cannot think clearly and we cannot find a way out. We become the deer in the headlight with no way to go, or the hamster that runs and runs but never gets anywhere.

In times of crisis we need to take extra care of ourselves, especially when the crisis threatens our reality or we feel  our life as we know it crumbling away. In those times we need a refuge. We need to know where we can go to feel safe and find respite. For babies, that place is the mother’s bosom. As adults, we don’t necessarily have a bosom to rush to. We need to create our own refuge to survive the challenge or crisis. Where do you find refuge? How can you tune into serenity when the country (and perhaps you too) is unsettled after the elections? How can you enjoy the season and take care of yourself?

The greatest place of refuge for me is nature. It has tremendous nurturing energies and restorative qualities. For me, nature has the power to transform stress into inner peace, whether i hike the ridge of the hills here in the San Francisco East Bay, walk through redwood forest, or enjoy a long stroll on the beach. Even a short walk can be magical, as i was reminded last Sunday. We were heading to San Francisco to check on a friend’s cats and decided to go to Fort Funston for a walk, but because we were busy until mid-afternoon, and because i needed a moment to gather myself, it was 4pm by the time we left Berkeley. We reached the bleach just before sunset which was regrettable, but we were in for a treat. It was one of the most magnificent sunsets i have experienced. The photo  above was taken that evening and i share it here to give you a glimpse of the colors that evoked the supernatural even though the photo does not give full justice to the magic of the moment. We did not get to walk far because the tide came in fast but we enjoyed every moment of our 30 minutes on the beach and left with our spirits soaring.

In a way, winter is the season for refuge. When the days grow short it’s the time to lean more inwardly and give refuge to body, mind, and soul. It’s the season for quiet time and for creative expression. Winter is the perfect time to grab a hot chocolate and a book and find a comfy couch or chair, or a hot tea and some art supplies. Another refuge is sharing time with friends. In Germany we have a tradition of coming together on December Sunday afternoons when it’s cold and grey outside, light candles, tell old stories, eat cookies and other treats, and perhaps engage in an art or craft project. As you know, i love SoulCollage and this time of the year i feel particularly drawn to it. It’s creative, it’s introspective, and it furthers deeply nurturing community. It’s perfect as it invites you to delve into yourself, then emerge with the images you found as we share our collage cards in the group. The depth of the sharing is often awe-inspiring.

What is your refuge? How can you give yourself more of it? How can you give yourself quality (soul)time?

Need help finding your refuge? I have a Holiday Special that might be just right for you. The BreakThrough Package includes a private visioning session plus one month of coaching for only $450—you save $150. It might also be just the right meaningful gift for a dear one. http://evaruland.com/gifts.html

Wishing you sweetness and peace,


Too Much To Do, Too Little Time — Lessons I Learned From New Media

7 May

I don’t know about you, but sometimes i am just plain overwhelmed with all the demands of everyday life. How could i possibly engage with all 547 Facebook friends, respond to an average of 45 emails per day, and return text messages as they come in, while seeing clients, conducting workshops, answering phone calls, tending to my family, exercising, socializing, and feeding myself healthy food; plus, staying current on training, business development, and circulating in the networking loop? Not to even mention writing blog entries and looking my best. My answer to this is, “I can’t.” My day has 24 hours, and i continue to insist on sleeping.

no time

So much to do, so little time…….

New communication technologies have made it possible for us to communicate around the globe with, theoretically, an unlimited number of people. That is fabulous. I thoroughly enjoy each Skype call with my sister and young niece in Germany; every Facebook message i exchange with my (until-recently) long-lost dear friend in Norway; keeping current with friends in Berlin; participating in threads of discussion in my global visionary business community; and being on peer calls with other coaches around the world.

And how about online business, learning, entertainment and shopping? I could spend all my time browsing the internet, following this link and that, doing a little research on when exactly something first originated, or who has something to say on a certain topic; I can visit other cities and foreign continents virtually; I can do my shopping online and spend hours and days ‘window’ shopping and comparison pricing. Whenever I am online at night, i forget time and end up getting too little sleep.

New communication technologies add more possibilities to our lives. They connect us with the entire planet in realtime and have added new dimensions to both our private lives and our work. They are a thrill. AND, there are problems that arise from them. Apart from the environmental benefit of buying locally, there is a physical component that needs to be considered. My body is still the kind of body it used to be 30 years ago—if not in all detail then at least in its principle structure and way of operation. It is made to be in the ‘here and now’ and manage the demands of a limited community. While I can do business with people in South Africa, there is a sanity that comes from doing business in my own time zone (reminder: sanity means health). When we are dealing with new communication technologies the most impressive part of them— the limitless possibilities of connecting—is responsible for the very trouble. We have not grown to be unlimited alongside our new tools. We ourselves are still limited in our capacity to take in.

The answer to this dilemma is to exercise discrimination and to make smart choices.

If you are overwhelmed, don’t get enough sleep, or have problems keeping a budget, here is a question for you: How many hours do you spend online, surfing the internet, talking and stalking on Facebook (or other social networking platforms), and shopping? How many things do you end up wanting that you could do just fine without before you saw that extra offer? Ask yourself, “What could I have done in the time I just spent online today?” Many things, i bet. One of them might be get more sleep; another, go for a walk and catch a glimpse of the weather, or how about an old-fashioned evening with friends and family? Meeting people in the flesh?

In this time of unlimited possibility there is only one thing that keeps me sane, and that is MAKING choices and letting go of wanting ALL. The key question is, “What are my priorities?” Answering this helps me consciously navigate the tasks and opportunities each day offers. Here are my top 10:

  • Having a healthy life style. This includes activities that further my physical well-being.
  • Serving my clients to the best of my ability.
  • Growing my business to ensure that i will be able to support myself.
  • Preparing most of my meals myself. It’s the best way of monitoring what i eat. (With a well-thought out diet i managed to lower my blood sugar out of the zone labeled ‘pre-diabetic’ and will hopefully avoid diabetes, a disease that runs in my family.)
  • Balancing myself emotionally and nurturing my connection to spirit. (Daily meditation is my answer to this.)
  • Honoring the ebb and flow of my energy.
  • Honoring my personality style.
  • Honoring relationships. (Not jumping on every social opportunity helps me to spent time with those i love.)
  • Honoring my curiosity for new developments. (Making time for cultural events and select news.)
  • Honoring my need for beauty. (Seeking out environments + activities that resonate with my appreciation (and need) for beauty.)
  • Supporting the environment and helping animals who are hunted down or otherwise mistreated.

As you can see, this list does not answer all questions on choices but it is a good starting point. With this list i can check if and how spending more time online, or with other activities, would serve me. What is your top 10?

© Eva Ruland, May 2014


Change takes awareness and discipline – most of us struggle with at least one of the two. It’s certainly easier to grow with the support and guidance of a teacher, coach or mentor. If you would like to explore working with me and getting me on your support team, contact me at eva_at_evaruland.com.